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From Zero to Hero of Time

Why am I having more fun with The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild than Horizon Zero Dawn given that the latter is a thousand times prettier and more polished, with deeper customization and far better dialog?

Whoops, I started with the conclusion!

For all their similarities (platform-exclusive post-apocalyptic narrative-driven bow-focused hunting/survival open world games) my first four hours with each one shows how they’re almost nothing alike.

Link on a brown horse, overlooking a green valley

Remember to Forget

What would you ask the Gaming Fairy to make you forget?

Final Fantasy VI

My absolute favorite RPG and, um, obvious inspiration. I love the characters, the way the story builds, losing Terra at one point, the escape from Vector, your brief foray into the land of Espers. Especially the stunning second half where the bad guy wins and destroys the world. Rebuild your team and take him down.

Final Fantasy VI cover art, Terra leans over her Magitek armor, overseeing the city below.

That Next Next Next

The Resident Evil series is already known for its famous (infamous?) doors, and these new doors were almost surely the result of a lot of careful toil and consideration. I bet there was a whole team that worked on them. Month after month, just getting those doors nice and polished. We can’t ship until the doors are working, guys. Gotta pull some overtime and finish up the doors.

Kirk Hamilton on Kotaku

I’ve watched Markiplier play Resident Evil 7 and I agree: the door gameplay is amazing.

A spooky white door, barely ajar

Bravely Diffident

Bravely Default is the most anime game I’ve ever played. It’s the animest (/ˈæn.ɪ.meɪɛst/).

Woman with long black hair in a white dress, sitting on a tree branch, kissing a butterfly

You control an innocent farm boy named Tiz, the kind of blank-stare everyman Invader Zim might terrorize. He’s joined by Agnès, priestess and beneficiary of modern Unicode text input, who attempts to save the world by being really really demure at everyone.

The Best Jurassic Park Sequel

Jurassic Park failed because Dennis Nedry was underpaid.

As a bidding contractor he shares the blame, but in the tech world we’d call him a bad hire. John Hammond says so himself through spoonfuls of ice cream in the Visitor’s Center. There are more specific lessons:

  • Invest in a build server so compile jobs can’t be expected to take down the security cameras
  • Use a source control system to track when your developers install backdoors
  • Upgrade every workstation’s graphics cards so your 3D fly-though Unix systems scroll at a reasonable pace.

Jurassic World has more than one point of failure. I’m going to discuss them all now, in detail, so beware of spoilers for the entire movie.

I can do anything better than you!

Hi, I'm HERO

The Witcher 3 is coming out next week and I’m vaguely excited. I wasn’t a fan of the last game thanks to its emotionless hero, awful user interface, and poorly explained combat. It looks like the sequel fixes… none of those. Geralt grumbles at every situation like he’s missing the last puzzle piece in the box. I’m watching these HD streams of console gameplay and straining to see the button prompts at the bottom right of the screen. But the combat looks nice, sort of, if you compare it to the Arkham games and not From Software’s titles.

The city of Novigrad, sure to be full of dirty and horrible people and elves

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